Growing up, I was accustomed to being the only ‘Christian’ girl in my friendship circle, and although I had Christian friends outside school, most of my day was spent with non-Christian friends. I am still close friends with a few of them and in time, I have come to see the importance of being intentional with my non-Christian friends where sharing the gospel is concerned.
I’ll be honest, being a light in such friendships can be a rollercoaster. You have some peak moments where a friend is asking questions and willing to hear the Gospel and form an opinion about it. Then some lows, when a friend responds, “That’s great for you, but I don’t think it’s for me.” I have had a friend say that they are neutral to the idea of hell and heaven, nonetheless, they want to point others to Jesus. Never have I felt so confused in my life.
So, how does one continue to love, be a faithful friend and point to Christ? Firstly, it is crucial to be reminded of why the Gospel is worth more than anything you or the world could ever offer.
Why should we share the Gospel?
You might be thinking this is such an easy answer, c’mon Maame. Yet, how often do you take the time to remind yourself of the Gospel, the cost of your salvation and what you have been redeemed from? These are questions we should often ask ourselves to help us form an attitude of gratitude (yes, be impressed with my rhyming skills) for our faith and allow that to transcend in all aspects of our lives.
The Gospel is the Lord’s power to save and we shouldn’t be ashamed of it, as (Romans 1:16). You are not sharing a figment of your imagination account or a fraudulent faith, but great news that saves people’s souls and brings true hope. It is also worth remembering that it is God who saves and not me or you. I constantly remind myself about that, especially with the friend who is neutral about hell and heaven.
This redemption did not come cheap, Christ bore the cost for us (Romans 3:25-26) and we did not deserve it. Our friends are in darkness, and they are exchanging the truth for a lie. We were in the same predicament until we heard the Gospel and believed.
This has been of great help to me whenever I hesitate to share my weekend plans consisting of church- feeling like a broken record. I am tempted to think to myself, things may get awkward between my friends and colleagues, and so to avoid the awkward social smiles and pretence of acceptance, I will keep my thoughts to myself.
When those thoughts creep in, I renew my mind in the Gospel. What I have been saved from and the blessing of a relationship with God. Allow that to motivate you. You hold the best gift ever! The power of the Gospel to save should motivate us to share, despite how difficult it can be. So what are some practical things to help you keep going?
Have mutual interests in each other’s lives
Sam Chan, in a podcast, stressed the importance of listening and showing interest in people’s lives which I have found helpful. As I have genuinely shown interest in my friends’ lives, they have in response, been interested to hear what I do. In fact, whilst I was doing mission work with students, I had great opportunities to share about my daily life.
So continue to genuinely ask about their lives. Know about their interests; be intentional in checking in on something they previously shared. And usually, in a healthy friendship, they too will be keen to hear about yours. Being open can be an avenue for great conversation but also invites events or church services which are easily accessible in a virtual age.
Blend your worlds
The Christian faith is not lived out in isolation but in community, and so is our evangelism. I am a strong believer in connecting people and forming even greater friendships so during university, my Christian flatmates and I would invite friends from our courses over and introduce them to our Christian friends.
Through that, we had friends joining our Christian Union meetings and attending events. So, I never felt alone when it came to sharing the gospel to my non-Christian friends. I had a whole team supporting me through prayer, and taking an interest in the lives of my friends. We host movie nights, game nights, birthday parties and at times just dinner together. We found that to be a great means to share our lives with them. Seeing both our Christian bubble and secular bubble mix was such a helpful way to share the Gospel.
By blending your worlds, you give your non-Christian friends an opportunity to see what it truly means to be part of God’s kingdom. They get to see why you and so many of your friends believe the Gospel to be true? It creates a friendly environment for them to ask questions and perhaps be open to sharing their thoughts.
Continue to pray for your friends
I can’t stress enough how much we should continue to pray for our friends not just individually but in community. Keep praying for God to work on their hearts; keep on asking God to help you be a faithful friend; and ask God for wisdom on how to carry conversations with them.
Live a crossed shaped life
I have learned to let my way of living speak louder than my words. If I say the Gospel is everything, I need to truly live a distinct life so that my friends would possibly be inclined to ask questions.
Entrust everything to God
Sadly, some of our friends might not accept the Gospel. That is heartbreaking; however, that shouldn’t stop us from sharing. God knows one’s heart; therefore, we should trust him and obey his command to share. Our time is not God’s time. It may be many years down the road before they respond to the Gospel. Perhaps in a different country by someone else whom the Lord will use.
I will end with an encouraging event concerning my friend. Last year I read a book by David Robertson, called Magnificent Obsession. Highly recommend it! I thought of a friend, and I asked her if she would be interested in reading it. She said yes and read it. Recently we had a conversation on the book and spoke for a lengthy time. She even shared she had been reading the Bible! I was so excited, and I think became so uncool in her eyes at the same time, which is fine. We thank God that it’s not on me to save people. I have known her for almost a decade, and this is our first proper heart conversation about the faith. We have planned to discuss more on what she read, also hopefully start reading the Bible together! How amazing is that?!
Don’t be discouraged by your family or friends who are hard to talk with or you have been continuously praying for. Continue praying for them and trust God.
Maame is a Ghanaian-Finn currently living in Scotland. She studied Psychology and currently works as a classroom assistant. She loves Jesus and is passionate for people to hear the gospel. When she is not working, she loves hosting people and having a laugh. Another one of her simple joys is binge-watching sitcoms on Netflix.
